And what if we did nothing?

Friends,

HOW ARE YOU?

I’ve been quiet. Ordinarily, I would say I was busy with this consultancy, that project, monetizing that hobby, chasing that grant… this, that, and the third. You know what I’m talking about (especially if you're informally employed).

But no… Outside of regular working hours, I’ve been doing nothing. Just… nothing. And wow, I can’t believe no one was going to tell me how necessary that is.

Last year, I started my journey back to myself and decided to SLOW DOWN. As a queer activist, there’s always something to chase (cue the checklist of all the things I would have said I was busy with)… As people, actually born to embrace the human experience, but forced to chase.

For a long time, I was always in pursuit of something. Another certificate, another fellowship, another grant… There was always more, and I had to have it. And it changed what the work was anchored in. The ego loves it when we chase. But the ego is never satiated. It just lives side by side with the limiting beliefs we tell ourselves that the more we achieve and chase, the more valuable we are… the more deserving we are.

But what happens when we do nothing?

Are we suddenly less deserving? Are we any less lovable? Who are we outside our achievements?

If we had nothing else except what the world tells us to value, then who would we be?

I know, I know. Too many questions. You're either thinking “wow, you’re right” or “Tina… relax.” The answer is: no, we are not less anything.

But anyway… chasing.

If you’re reading this, we’ve worked together or know each other in some personal or professional capacity, and you know I’m quite passionate about the work and putting my all into it. I would love to get the big grant or the once-in-a-lifetime consultancy. But now, I no longer let the fear of never getting those push me to chase in order to prove myself.

It’s okay if I only submit three proposals instead of seven.
It’s fine if I don’t feel like applying for anything.
It’s okay if my work allows me flexible hours and more rest.
It’s okay if I have free time and don’t fill it with courses.

What is mine will come to me even if I don’t chase it.

Anyway. This is my journey. Take from it what resonates with you and leave what doesn’t. But if anything can ring in your head that you allow to be true today, let it be this: even without a single achievement, you are worth more than anything money can buy.

You are loved, friends. Thank you for reading.

Below I’ve shared some of the content I’ve been consuming during my “do nothing” time. Enjoy.

🎬 Movies and Shows

• Back in Action – I watched this twice because it just made me feel GOOD. That nostalgia of watching actors you grew up knowing still out there doing it? It hits.

• The Mentalist – Television used to be JAWDROPPING.

📚 Books

• Fuck Like a Goddess – Alexandra Roxo

• How to Be the Love You Seek – Nicole LePera

• Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love

• Contemplations of Philosophy

🎧 Podcasts

• Mindful in Minutes – Bite-sized guided meditations

• Deepak Chopra’s 21 Days of Gratitude – Changed my life

• Made It Out – Stories of survival and healing

• UnF*ck Your Brain – Feminist self-help, daily gems guaranteed

📺 YouTube

• Boho Beautiful Yoga – Yoga, meditation, movement

• Fabulous 50s – Low-impact workouts with a great vibe

And in line with being, not always doing, I hope you find your version of stillness.